transition and transformation

It is definitely amazing what God can do in just a short amount of time. That is one of the visions of Nehemiah Teams… believing that God can and will use His faithful servants wherever they are in the world and no matter how long they spend there. Just a mere two months in Malaysia gave me a glimpse of that vision, and I was able to experience the awesome power of God working in and through my team. It was a transforming summer in every way possible.

God used this summer to reinforce some obvious truths for me. As simple as it sounds, I learned to genuinely depend on God. This is something that I had told myself I was ok at before, but I ended up flat on my face when I realized just how self-sufficient and dependent upon my own strength and ability I really was. There is a quote I read during one of my quiet times this summer that spoke this truth beautifully. “Sooner or later we are confronted with the painful truth of our inadequacy and insufficiency. Our huffing and puffing to impress God, our scrambling for brownie points, and our thrashing about trying to fix ourselves are nauseating to God and are a flat denial of the gospel of grace. Through no merit of ours, but by His mercy, we have freedom in Christ and abundant life. This is the Good News…the Gospel of Grace.” This quote brought me to my knees begging for forgiveness and confessing my own insufficiency and need for God’s strength.

One thing He led me to realize is just how powerful He really is, especially through my weaknesses. There were days I was a little homesick (one day to the point of tears), but I was always comforted by the fact that God had a purpose for me during my short time there. Some days I felt completely ineffective and discouraged because we weren’t seeing anyone give their life to Christ or even come close to making a decision. Those days were the hardest. However, God was at work even when I couldn’t see or feel it. Even when I am lacking in faith, He is faithful. When I am tired and discouraged, He lifts my head and covers me with His love and peace. God reaffirmed this when I returned home. Throughout my time in Malaysia I never saw anyone surrender their life to the Lord, but a harvest was still reaped! One week after I returned home, I received a phone call via Skype from a fellow sister in Christ and friend in Malaysia. She informed me that since my team and I left, two girls had become Christians! These were girls that we had shared the gospel with multiple times and invested in. Praise the Lord for His faithfulness! I also learned that two more girls became believers a week after that, one of which was formerly a Muslim! God had shown me over and over that He was at work and was using us to reach people, but at times it was hard to see. It is really humbling to know that God is the ONLY one who can make the seeds grow. We just have to be obedient in planting seeds and watering the ones that have already been sown, and leave the rest up to the God who brings salvation to the nations!


"Those who sow in tears will reap with songs of joy. He who goes out weeping, carrying see to sow, will return with songs of joy, carrying sheaves with him." --Psalm 126:5-6